From Rags to Riches, or Vice Versa...

Yes, it has been many a day too long since I have updated in the Hub. There has been a pressing issue on my mind the last couple weeks, though. I believe that you all deserve to hear it…

My wife and I have decided that it is time to move back to the land of our forefathers, or at least back to the land of my childhood. You read correctly. P-town, the most awesome person to ever grace your streets is returning to his old domain. I wish I could tell you that we found a house, but when I asked our income if that were possible he just started laughing. After he finished, he asked if that was a serious question. I just let go at that point.

But we are moving in the coming weeks and I expect all of you reading this to give me a call and be there for the big day. I am thinking it will probably take around 3 hours as there is not a whole lot of junk to move. The distance between our future residence is also pretty close, so that helps. Of course, if you are not there to help I will understand that you hate both my wife and me and that you hope never to see us again. For those of you who are there, I believe a round of golf on me is appropriate as payment.

FYI, this place is located 2 blocks from your mom’s house. Just up the hill. The landlord used to live next door to your mom’s house before the shirtless leaf blower moved in. Maybe you know the place.

Some benefits of the move include, but are not limited to:

Cell phone reception
Electricity
Civilization
Stores within 10 miles
Natural Gas
No animals

Forgive Me Father, For I Have Sinned...

The first annual family migration to AZ is almost upon us. This trip will be filled with awesome stuff including, but not limited to; 18 holes of golf in hell, good food, GH3, dunkball, pool lounging, and the Braves vs. Diamondbacks game.

I now have a confession to make. I do not follow the Braves as closely as I should, I don't own a Braves jersey, the only Braves shirt I have was given to me by Ri-Bone (thanks). You could say that I am a Braves fan by default. However, due to a terrible season and a devastating and contagious something or other, the team has been riddled with injuries. Now, that is not my fault. "I did not break the pace car" (Rome). But my problem now is that I only know the name of 1 player on the team without looking it up, and I don't even know how to spell it - Frenchy. I know that they have a new cf because the dough boy has been traded to LA. I know, it's ridiculous how little I have learned.

Now, I am excited to go and watch the game and I will cheer on the Braves. I am just asking for guidance from those who know more than I, and that have been there through thick and thin. I need to know what to watch for - if there is anything left. So I ask you, faithful Brave loving blungle members, to teach me to walk in the light of Bobby. Who is decent? Who is fat? Who even plays? Can any of them hit? I now am going to do a little research as it is the second step of my repentance process.