Softball Guy Vs. Flag Football Guy

This is really two posts in one. It's a bit long, feel free to take a potty break half way through if you need to.

As you are all aware, the "Iron Pigs" had their first tournament game against "Game Over" last night. Here is an update of what happened...

The Iron Pigs start with the ball on their own 2 yard line (this is normal - it's where you always start). We quickly get to 3rd and twenty until some jack arse from Game over decides to rough the passer. Keep in mind that it's flag football. Anyway, for his stupidity, instead of being 4th and 20, a nearly impossible conversion, it is now 1st and 5. Thank you, you homo. This same guy ends up diving at Brian W's legs twice more in the next three plays. Not cool. Something needs to be done. There are some words exchanged, but nothing big happens. We score a touchdown, they score a touchdown - it's all tied up 6-6 at half time in a defensive battle.

Second half starts as Game Over marches right down the field to go up 12-6. They fail to get the conversion. We get the ball, march about have way down the field until they stop us and take possession of the ball. At this point we really need a defensive stop. So the eldest, most experienced player on the team (Brian) pulls out his signature move, he rushes the passer, causes an hurried throw, tips the ball, catches it for an interception, and runs about 4 yards before he is run down. Excellent. We, however, do not capitalize on the turnover. G.O. still leads 12-6. They now have the ball.

At this time I have had enough and decide that I am going to be Lawrence Taylor for the next 10 minutes. I was. I recorded my first sack of the year but it didn't slow them down for long. They marched down to the goal line.... It was 3rd and goal from our own 8 yard line. This could make or break the game. The iron pigs need to dig deep. They do. Casey A. rushes with Nate Q... the linebacker and secondary lock up all the receivers G.O. can throw at them (5), and I get the sack. Boo-ya. 4th and twenty. A nearly impossible conversion. G.O. goes for the end zone, the ball is tipped and dropped. Iron pigs ball. The momentum has turned completely in our favor.

The pigs begin their march. With the help of two very controversial calls (a pass interference and a bull-rush), the pigs tie it up on a ball that was tipped three times - como se dice Karma? At this point G.O. is furious. We are in their heads. Tony D. (QB for G.O.) throws one up for grabs - He had not learned in the first half that this was not a good idea, as Corbin W. (safety for the pigs) had knocked down 5 balls that were the exact same play - Anyway, Tony throws it up for grabs, this time Corbin picks it off and runs it back to Game Over's 25 yard line. There are 30 seconds to play.

Game Over is flagged for a personal foul for swearing at the official, giving the pigs an extra 15 yards. We will take it (at this time the offender's (Telmo T.) girlfriend is heard saying "Jeez, apparently it's the super bowl - a chuckle is heard as well). 2 plays later, I find myself in the end zone with the ball and 4 seconds left. Game over for Game Over. The upset special just happened. They are pissed. I am loving life, and the pigs survive to see another day. I cannot take all the credit for the victory. The entire crew played extremely well.

Now, as for the title of this post. I would like to compare Softball guy to Flag football guy.

SB guy: Yells "Boom" after a hit.
FF guy: Yells "That a boy, son! or That's what I'm talkin' about, son" after EVERY play, even though they are not related, and the play was not that fantastic.
SB guy: Believes he is playing in the World series and his high school coach hated him.
FF guy: Believes he is playing in the Super Bowl and that his high school coach hated him.
SB guy: Thinks he is super awesome and so hot right now.
FF guy: Thinks that he can "beat your A--" even though he is 4'5". This actually happened last night, no joke - the whistle is blown, and the game momentarily stops. The official yells, "dog on the field". I look around and see, not a lab, not a pit bull, but Paris Hilton's dog. Well, it wasn't hers, but it looked just like hers - it even has a pink sweater on. Ya. So this 4' nothing kid picks it up, pets it, and takes it back to his girlfriend. I say "Is that seriously your dog?" As I am laughing, to which he replies, "shut up! I'll beat you A." I continue to laugh, and go to hike the ball. Wow. That just happened.

SB guy: Will eventually get killed by the Karma. It happens every time.
FF guy: Will eventually get killed by the Karma. Roughing the passer, Bull-rushing, and diving at players legs in flag football will come back to bite you when you least expect it.

War beating teams that deserve it.