Friday, January 18, 2008

This will make you laugh...

REACTION!

So this bum is getting audited by the IRS. He doesn't have a job, but drives this nice car and lives in a nice house. Anyway - the bum ends up in the agent's office. The IRS agent says to him, "our records show that you make around $300,000 a year, what is the deal?" "Well, I'm a gambling man" replies the bum, "in fact, I'll prove it to you. I'll bet you 10 grand that I can kiss my own teeth." "No one can do that - you're on." says the agent. The bum then takes out his dentures and kisses them. "See, easy as that - I'll bet you another 10 grand that I can kiss my own eye." "No one can do that - you're on." says the agent. The bum then takes out his glass eye and kisses it. At this point the agent is starting to get a bit flustered. "OK, last one. Double or nothing. I'll bet you another 20 grand that I can pee in that mug from right here." The bum points over at a cup that is on a bookshelf on the other side of the agent's desk. The thing is like 15 feet away. The agent looks at the bum, then looks at the mug, thinks about it and says, "there is no way that you can do that. You're on." So sure enough the bum starts peeing all over this IRS agent's office. All over his desk, on the floor, the wall, anything he can reach - but not the cup. So the agent looks and the bum and asks "What were you thinking? You just lost 20 grand!"

"Ya, but I bet my lawyer 50 grand that I could come in here and piss all over your desk, and that you would be happy about it."

So there you go. A nursing buddy told us that one the other day during a break and I have been sharing the love ever since. By the way - not a lot going on in our neck of the woods. My smoking hot wife chopped her hair off. It is now near shoulder length. Yep, she is smoking hot. Also, I learned about shock in class the other day. Pretty interesting. Side note: if you are in shock - go to the emergency room or you will die.

On to some other not so good news - Tyler's top teeth are making their way down... really slowly. Not awesome. And is anybody else ready for the Patriots to just win the freaking Superbowl already so we can move on? I am so sick of Tom Brady this, Randy Moss that. That concludes my rant.

War Roger "the Rocket" Clemens being found guilty. That guy needs to be kicked in the groin... well... we all know the side effects of those steroids.

HAVE I GIVEN YOU ENOUGH TO TALK ABOUT? THIS IS YOUR SHOW! TAKE IT OVER!

13 comments:

Tikes said...

So did he have to pay the taxes or what? You left me hanging...

Hub said...

I think the IRS agent was just glad to let him go and never see him again.

Anonymous said...

I have heard that joke before, but it was a guy in a bar and the bartender laughing. Old joke sorry. Also, What kind of shock did you talk about, cardiogenic, neurogenic, anaphylactic?

Tikes said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tikes said...

Dr. P, what were you doing in a bar? Other than listening to a guy tell this story to the bartender...

I think Hub was talking about shell shock....

War me referencing TMNT on the blogs.

Hub said...

Actually we talked mostly about Hypovolemic and Septic. I also learned about DIC (Disseminating Intravascular Coagulation). Very bad news.

Colby must have been down to the Wee Blu in on Mainstreet. I hear their burgers are great.

Leonardo has always been my fave.

Riley Alexander said...

In the nintendo game yes, he's the #1 choice, but in the movies, you got my man Raph, with those sia's, he's the man. He is (as lunt would say) a billy bad a. About the joke, loved it! Also, tell us Colby, what were you doing in wee blu?

Hub said...

I thought for sure you were a Mikey guy. I never really cared for Ralph and his poor attitude.

Tikes said...

I simply hated that game because I would get so nervous in the water and shake so violently that I swam myself right into the electrical side, and drowned/shocked myself to death.

Riley Alexander said...

I like mikey, and his personality matches mine pretty good, but he's too clumsy to be my favorite. raph, is dark, mysteriouse, and doesn't let anyone tell him what to do. As for the turtles game, I use to have the hardest time with that too. But, practice makes perfect Tikes. In fact, I bet I could pass that board right now... maybe I will

Amanda said...

I'll just say in reply to this post that I love Ashley's new hair cut too!! Very cute!

Anonymous said...

shock drown yourself, does that count as electric or hyperaquatic shock?

Tikes said...

both, so I think you would call it Electric hyperaquatic shock.